SUPPORT FOR SINGLES DEALING WITH DIVORCE
Has someone cheated?
Are you considering Divorce or are you ready to contact a lawyer?
Do you know that when parents are in conflict during divorce, children are in danger?
I can show you how to help your child feel understood.
Do you recognize how much your behavior impacts your children?
Depending on the age of your child the reaction he or she will have to your divorce, may vary.
Give your child a voice. “ Can I take my dog?”, “Will I still play soccer?”
By bringing your child to therapy you can help him/her avoid feeling isolated, anxious, or confused.
I know you love your children.
About 30 to 40 percent of people who go through a divorce report a significant increase in symptoms of depression, and anxiety
Call me because I can:
• Allow your child learn to express his or her feelings in a safe setting • Teach your child some coping techniques • Help your child deal with parental conflict • Teach your child the best way to express any feelings of anger that they may have • Reinforce with your child that the divorce is not their fault
Parents, you are the most powerful thing in your child’s world. If you are feeling confused and helpless or worried about your child during this difficult time please give me a call to set up an appointment.
•Separation Coach – In this role I can help an individual get through the stress of the divorce process. I would educate them and help them manage their expectations about the process and/or the behavior of the other parent.
•Consultation to the Family Attorney – In this role I would help an attorney, (usually one who is collaborative) from a mental health prospective, with a difficult client, or a challenging situation regarding the children.
•Single session consultation – In this role I may help parents what to say to their children when they have decided to divorce. Or, I may help them resolve a single issue such as what to tell the children, or manage the situation if one parent’s job will take them far away so they won’t see the children regularly.
•Divorce Counseling – As a divorce counselor I can help you understand how your chid is affected by divorce keeping in mind their developmental level and age.
I can help you learn ways to the reduce stress of dealing with an angry co-parent.
I can assist you in learning strong parenting skills as you and your child experience the “day to day” life of parents who are divorced.
I can educate you how to become aware of signs that your child may be in distress and need therapy him or herself.
•Reunification Therapy – This is specialized therapy where there is conflict or great distance (emotionally) between a parent and child. Perhaps the child does not want to visit the other parent? Perhaps one or the other parent has been absent for a long period of time and the child doesn’t “know” that parent. I can assist with this and other types reunification therapy.
•Child Therapy – I have much experience working with the child or children who are have a “tough time” with their parents divorce. Maybe their grades are falling. Maybe they are acting out. These and many other signs are a signal individual child therapy would be beneficial.
As a caring parent, call me, let’s talk to see if I can be of help.
Individual one on one High Conflict Divorce Counseling available as well a co-parent counseling. Flexible scheduling, Saturday appointments available.
Having a Vision for Your family After Divorce or Separation 5 Things to Consider…
How do you want your children to remember their Parent’s divorce?
1. They attended my soccer games and school functions and acted in a respectful non arguing manner?
2. They allowed me to be open about what I did and what experiences I had when I was at my other parent’s house.
3. They modeled for me how to be in an adult relationship. I have learned how to negotiate and collaborate instead of fighting in an immature way which causes most relationships to fail.
4. They modeled a respectful, co-operative relationship with my other parent instead of blaming my other parent for the problems.
5. They have allowed me to remember a happy childhood not one of constant fighting and disagreements.
What Are Your Hopes and Dreams For Your Children?
The following goals will help you focus on the needs of your children and NOT on your conflict with the other parent.
- We will shield our children from conflict
- We will not use our children as messengers or confidants
- We will not criticize the other parent in front of the children or within earshot of the children.
- We will nurture our children’s love for both of us.
- We will agree beforehand exactly what information will be shared with the children.
- We will willingly share information about our children’s wellbeing such as schoolwork, extra curricular activities, and doctor’s appointments.
- We will reassure our children that they will always have two parents that love them and the failure of our marriage is in no way a result of anything they have done or said.
- We will encourage our children to express their feelings but we, as the parents, will make the decisions.
- We will begin resolving child related issues in a way that reflects the values stated above as soon as possible, because our children will suffer emotional damage if we do not work to implement these goals.
For more information contact Vi Ballard, MFT #35376, 310-373-7994